The truth about my binge eating | Getting Back On Track Series, Chapter 2

Photo credit: Bethany Newman

At the beginning of February, I made a pledge to change my relationship with food over the course of 2016.

For once I made no plans to lose ten pounds or to build my glutes to bikini model proportions.

Instead, I chose to spend February quietly observing, with as little judgment as possible, my eating habits.

And what I discovered actually shocked me:

I am an emotional binge eater

Which I have never seen myself as before, but I  am. I am the Queen of Dairy rolling around in clotted cream.

Most days I will eat somewhere between 2000 and 3000 calories composed mostly of dairy and refined carbohydrates. The days when I am sad or stressed, I’m at 3000 calories and beyond.

One day included: chocolate for breakfast, biscuits for a mid-morning snack, cheese toasty for lunch, two scones complete with clotted cream and jam, an apple (winning), hot chocolate topped with whipped cream and marshmallows, more biscuits, vegetarian curry for dinner, and cake for dessert.

Much of the time I feel nauseous and bloated, and I don’t like what I see in the mirror.

I also noted that the days when I had food prepped, my binging was kept to a minimum.

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What are you living your life by and is it serving you? | Who or what is your “Higher Power”?

Photo Credit: Zain Bhatti // Unsplash

Photo Credit: Zain Bhatti // Unsplash

Now, I use the term ‘higher power’ because I’m not necessarily talking about God or any kind of religious concept – for many people their higher power is spiritual, but for others it might well not be.

I’m talking about that ‘Thing’ or idea that you live your life by and aspire to. It’s what brings you sanity on the days when you just can’t quite think straight. It’s what helps you to determine the path of your life and the choices that you make. It could be a god; it could be the universe; it could be Society; it could be a philosophy; it could be a particular set of values or principles; it could be food and calories; it could be humankind; it could be drugs or alcohol; it could be sex and sexual validation.

The concept of having a higher power outside of religion occurred to me after I spoke to a lady who had just gotten out of an abusive relationship:

“I made him my higher power,” she told me, shaking her head. “My whole life revolved around him and how I could make him happy. If I ever had a decision to make, I would go by his opinion. If he told me I was rubbish, I believed him. If he told me I was beautiful, I believed him. I didn’t have God – I had my boyfriend.”

This got me a-thinking about what I my higher power is and also what it is for other people in my life.

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Getting Back On Track for 2016! | Creating a sustainable & healthy lifestyle

Getting Back On Track Series

A couple of weeks ago I featured some ideas and links to amazing blogs to help get you motivated for the new year, and this week I am bringing my brand new series, ‘Getting Back On Track‘.

I have been out of the gym since November 2015 due to injuries, and I have been comfort eating and binge eating to the extreme. My muscle definition has gone, my cellulite is back, and I have been suffering all kinds of aches and pains in my joints. My skin is breaking out, and I haven’t been in the best of moods much of the time (not sure how people do without endorphins long-term!)

In short, I’ve been failing to look after myself, and not really sticking to my New Year’s goals.

So, now that February has begun and the dust from all the January excitement has settled, I thought that now would be a good time to amp up the lifestyle section of this blog with a brand new series!

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New Year’s Resolution Inspiration | Getting your New Year’s Resolutions off the ground

Photo Credit: Daria Nepriakhina

Photo Credit: Daria Nepriakhina

Many people are getting into the swing of 2016, whilst some of us are, er, slightly lagging behind.

Either way, all we know is that we’ve eaten at least three Terry’s chocolate oranges, and devoured an entire box of After Eights and downed a bottle of Baileys within the hour; the gyms are crowded and uninviting; and kale is still stiff and unappetising.

Some people are screaming “New Year, New Me!”, but let us politely punch those people in the face and get on with more practical matters such as negotiating who gets the last Matchstick.

Having said all that, a small dose of motivation and inspiration never hurt anyone, so I thought that I would take a look around for some useful tips, tricks and web links to help get you in the right frame of mind for 2016.

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26 things that I have learned in 26 years

Diary writing

So, this month is my 26th birthday! It seems like only yesterday that I was complaining about being asked for ID and embarking on my whirl-wind international adventure.

The other day I was reading my old journals from when I was a teenager, and I got-a thinking about all the things that I have learned over the years. Comparing just how different I am to when I was 12 or when I was 16, etc.

So, I thought it would be nice to reflect on the lessons that I have learned over the years and share them with you. So, without further-a-do, here I go:

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